Resurrections
"So you’re leaving?" Rika looked up from her book at the sound of Myrelle’s voice. The Musk Cat padded into her room on silent feet. "It’s only been two days since...are you sure you’re ready to go back?"
Rika closed the book and stood up. "It’s time, Most Reverent," she told him, still feeling oddly about the honorific. "Tamgren and the others have already gone back to Motavia. The Esper Mansion is a wonderful home away from home, bu t..."
"Too much of Chaz?"
She nodded, momentarily unable to speak. "What..." she paused and collected herself. "What are you going to do now, Most Reverent?"
"Please, Rika," the Musk Cat pleaded. "Myrelle?"
"I’m sorry, Myrelle," she replied, smiling faintly.
"Well, once you’ve left I’ve no other immediate obligations...it’s time for me to go back to the Myst Vale. I need to pay my respects and move on. It sounds callous, but...I have a new life and new responsibilities here in the Esper Mansion. T here’s a village of refugees out there that need me, Dezolis and Motavia are in shambles...and I’m told I’m the one who’s supposed to make it right."
"You’re lonely."
Evidently it was Rika’s turn to hit close to the mark. Myrelle didn’t respond, and she decided to change the subject. "Any sign of the Elsydeon?"
Myrelle shook his head. "None at all. Some people still aren’t convinced it wasn’t stolen while you and Lant were seeing to Chaz, but I think it’s gone. The sacred sword doesn’t just disappear unless it wants to, Rika. I think, for whatever it ’s worth, that that’s the surest sign we’ll ever get that it’s over. Elsydeon’s not coming back, and in a way, I’m happy about that. It’s served its purpose."
"Well, if you want to go to the Myst Vale, I guess Lant and I should think about going."
"No hurry," Myrelle told her wistfully, then sighed. "I’ll get someone to Jump you two to Aiedo." He turned and walked to the doorway. "Oh, and I sent Narrel to find Lant for you, so they should be along."
"How is...Narrel?"
"Like all of us. He’s healing."
* * *
"It took me a long time to find you," Narrel told Lant, coming up behind him. The younger man sat on a rock about a hundred feet out from the Mansion, staring across the chasm. Lant glanced up at the Speaker, and saw he was wearing a heav y cloak, and a hood that hid his face.
"Rika’s ready to go, then?"
"Yes." The Speaker sighed. "It feels like its been such a long, long time. So much has happened."
Lant suddenly perceived Narrel’s deep-seated need to talk, and to talk to him, though Lant couldn’t understand why. He hardly knew Narrel. He looked up once more. "How are you doing, Narrel?"
"I’m all right. I can look in the mirror, or touch my face, without wanting to cry. The pain’s gone, but in so many ways it isn’t...it’ll stay with me forever." Narrel looked down, and Lant could see that his face was wrapped as well, and he wore an eyepatch. One piercing blue eye stared at Lant from beneath the hood. "I always respected you, Lantamaral," he said suddenly.
"Why’s that?" Lant asked, taken aback.
"We went through similar things in the wars, I think...I heard from your brother what was done to you."
Lant nodded. "I know you were Morovin’s prisoner."
"It went deeper than that. They tried to...destroy me from the inside." Lant nodded, and that seemed to empower the Speaker to go on. "I always respected you for going on, but in the wrong way...I saw you in me. I was wrong. You took what happened to you and made it into something positive, used it to change your life. All I did with it was use it to fuel my hatred. And it...hurt me."
Lant was silent for a moment while he thought about it. "Thank you, Narrel," he said after a moment. "Would you like to take off your hood?"
The Speaker started in surprise. Lant stared straight ahead and said nothing. Slowly, Narrel reached up and pushed down the hood, then peeled away the wrappings and the eyepatch. His hands dropped to his sides and Lant looked up once more. A tear ran from Narrel’s good eye as he met Lant’s gaze, eyes-to-eyes, and Lant knew it took all of his strength. Lant stood up and gently clapped Narrel on the shoulder. "That’s right. Look me in the eye." He raised his other hand to the Speaker’s othr shoulder and they stood there in the snow. Lant knew how naked Narrel must feel, exposing his disfigurements – and they were quite awful – for probably the first time since he’d come out of the coma. He held the Speaker’s gaze by sheer force of will.
Lant smiled. "We should go."
Narrel nodded and reached up, carefully replacing the eyepatch over the mangled socket that had once been his eye. He looked down into his hand for a moment at the wrappings he held, then slowly opened his fingers and let them fall, let the wind ca rry them away. Narrel looked up and this time met Lant’s gaze immediately, without prompting.
"I’m ready," he said.
* * *
"I guess that’s everything," Tamgren said, surprised at the lump in his throat. He looked around at the room that had once been his...Zelan had reclaimed its own, and it looked just like another room again, as if Tamgren had never been.
"It’s for the best," Demi told him, leaning up against the doorframe. "It really is. You’ll be happier on Dezolis."
"How’s Shar?"
"It’s a struggle," Demi replied. "But I think it’s one we can win. It took me awhile to get used to the fact that the things she did for Seth weren’t really her fault. That was my big hurdle. I’ve overcome it now. I’m ready to help h er."
"Eldara resigned her Councilman position. She said there was too much...too many memories, in Gumbious. Most of the Magi died."
"I know."
"For now, we’ve decided to live by the Esper Mansion. There are more refugees coming into the town every day. They need us, I guess." He sighed again, and cast his eyes about the room. "It was hard to lose my family, Demi," he w hispered. "I never thought it would be so hard to lose my home, too."
"You’re not losing a home," Demi chided gently. "You’re gaining a new one. You’ll always be welcome here, you know that. But Eldara can give you something Wren, Danielle, and I never could."
He sighed once more. Demi patted him on the arm. "Stop that. You’re making me sad. You’re getting married, Tamgren!" He was silent. "I know how you’re hurting right now, Tamgren," she said after a moment, "and there are som e wounds nobody but you can heal. But listen to me. Listen!" She waited to make sure she had his full attention. "You aren’t betraying anyone to be happy. Chaz, Alys...none of them would want you to wait on them. Not Chaz, not Alys, not your fam ily. You don’t owe them anything, Tamgren, because they gave themselves willingly."
Tamgren took a shuddering breath. "It’s okay," Demi said. "I know. The others are coming. It’s time." As if on queue, Danielle and Wren appeared at the doorway.
"Your shuttle is ready now, Tamgren," Wren told him.
"If you’re ready too," Danielle pointed out.
"I guess so. If you guys think you can keep this place running without me." He grinned at them. He paused. "Wren, Danielle..."
"I think I know what you are going to say," Wren told him. He glanced down at Danielle. "I don’t agree with everything Danielle wants to do, but...I will try."
Danielle nodded. "Wren and I have reached an agreement which is viable, Tamgren." The Android smiled at him. "We both realized that we were being petty to one another. There are...more important things." Danielle looked up at th e larger Android. "We will try together."
Tamgren nodded. "Thanks. Do you think I could have a moment, alone?"
"Of course," Demi said firmly before the others could speak. "Take as much time as you like." She quickly bustled the other two out. "We’ll wait." He heard the door click behind her.
Is this what life is? Goodbyes? He’d lived in this room, this satellite, for five years. The Androids had taken him in, probably against their better judgement, after his parent’s death. Five years ago, still running from the pain, living like a re cluse had seemed like a pretty good idea. It had taken a war to bring him back into the affairs of real, biological life...and regardless of whether or not he regretted it, he was stuck now.
Eldara was waiting for him. That made it worth it, all of it, and he was thankful for that much. Demi was right...Chaz, Alys...they were gone, but he still had hope, still had friends. Tamgren Aiedern was still alive. If Chaz or Alys had seen him m oping around like he had been, they would have slapped him back in line so fast...
He found himself laughing and crying at the same time, and he knew it was time to leave. Waiting for him here were the Androids to give him a send-off to his new home, and below was Eldara, waiting for him. His wife. Tamgren Aiedern’s wife. He said it out loud and liked the way it rolled off his tongue. Maybe even...his family, eventually.
Tamgren wiped his eyes, smiled, and turned off the lights on his way out.
* * *
Rika stood alone in the tent with the coffins. Outside she could hear the crowds who had come to watch – from Motavia, from Dezolis...the Androids had come from Zelan to pay tribute to the fallen.
She was terrified. She’d written a speech, they expected her to say something, but it didn’t work, it just didn’t fit...She looked around her, at the coffins of the people she was speaking for. Kyra, fallen before the war began. Rachel, who had tou ched off the end of the violence through her sacrifice. Alys, her mother, who had died for the people who couldn’t fight. And Chaz...
She heard the flap of the tent rustle behind her, and turned as Lant entered. "Are you ready?" he asked.
"Everything’s set?" Lant nodded. Rika carefully straightened her dress uniform. "I shouldn’t be doing this, Lant. I’m not a speaker, you know me..."
"You’ll do fine." Lant looked at the set of three wooden stairs leading out of the tent, onto the podium, where the people of Algo expected her to give a speech. He crossed the tent and tapped the first step with his foot. "It’s only wood. The hardest thing you’ll do today, Rika, is put your foot on that step. Once you’ve done that, you’re committed and you’ve got no choice about anything. The thing is, you know you’ve got to take that first step, but you’re afraid of it, too. All yo u have to do is get started. The rest will fall into place. What about your speech?"
Rika threw up her hands. "It doesn’t fit at all! Mom I could speak for, and Chaz, but Rachel? Kyra?"
"You knew them."
"Yes."
Lant sighed. "I’m not much a of a speaker myself, Rika, but I’d just talk. Nobody wants great rehearsed speeches from you. They’re here because they need closure – we all do. We need some great sign to show us this is all over. They need to kn ow Morovin Lan’Tearin isn’t going to rise from his shallow grave with the Profound Darkness at his heels. Just let them know we’re finished, we can all go home and have a good night’s sleep."
"You sound a little like Gryz."
"He’s a smart man. Anyway, I should go." He glanced out at the stage. "Looks like they’re about ready. You set, big sister?"
Rika looked with trepidation out at the stage. "Not quite. Lant, I’m sorry. I wasted eight years because I was angry. I had to think you were dead before I realized what I’d done wrong. I...I was wrong about you, Lant, and I’m sorry. You’re my brother. I should’ve had more faith.’
Lant smiled, his eyes shining. "We have plenty of time."
"Yeah. You’re...going to hang around Aiedo afterwards, right?"
Lant nodded. "If you’d like me to."
"I would, Lant." Her brother nodded again and raised the tent flap.
"Consider it done, Rika. I’ve...missed you a lot." He wiped at his eyes. "Just remember...take the first step and you’ll be fine." The flap fell behind him, and Rika was alone.
"Thank you," she whispered at the flap after he was gone. She glanced out. The stage was set. They were ready for her. "I never should have let Lars talk me into this." She looked down at the step at her feet, then up again at t he coffins around her. "Mom, Chaz, Kyra, Rachel...wish me luck."
Her foot touched the steps, and she ascended them into the light.
The End